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Subject: Old People
A couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things.
They decide to go to the doctor for a checkup. The doctor tells them that
They're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to
Help them remember.
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair.
His wife asks, "Where are you going?"
"To the kitchen" he replies.
"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"
"Sure."
"Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" she asks.
"No, I can remember it."
"Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. You'd better write it down
Because you know you'll forget it."
He says, "I can remember that! You want a bowl of ice cream with
Strawberries."
"I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, so you'd
Better write it down!" she retorts.
Irritated, he says, "I don't need to write it down, I can remember it!
Leave me alone! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it,
For goodness sake!" Then he grumbles into the kitchen.
After about 20 minutes the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his
Wife a plate of bacon and eggs.
She stares at the plate for a moment and says - "Where's my toast?
...................
A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me
Four thousand pounds, but it's state of the art. It's perfect."
"Really," answered the neighbour. "What kind is it?"
"Twelve thirty."
................
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days
Later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous
Young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really
Doing great, aren't you?"
Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc. 'Get a hot mamma and be
Cheerful.'"
The doctor said, "I didn't say that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur.
Be careful.'"
....................
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself
Slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a
Banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"
"No," he replied, "arthritis."
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